Thursday, August 18, 2011

Day 18 - August 18

As usual, I was up too late last night, reading a book. So I couldn't roust myself out of bed when I wanted to this morning and slept in til about 7:00.

I'm not as sore as I was worried about. Maybe I'm getting a little wiser with age. Something's gotta be improving, right?

Today was all about work and my kitchen. Working 8 hours, spending too long stretches sitting down. I get caught up in stuff, or in a 2 hour meeting, and I just don't move around enough. Some days are better than others, but yesterday, when I was moving a lot, it was all outside in the scorching heat. (By the way, we're up to 18 days of triple digit temps!)

When I got home, it was dinner and then play time with the kiddo. That lasted until 8, then I got busy working on my kitchen cabinets. They are all now glazed! Hurray!!! And I got the first gloss coat on the cabinet boxes. I think I'll have to do a little sanding and go back and add a second gloss coat in a few places, but I got a lot done today. It'll be pretty difficult to gloss the doors, but I'll just have to take it slowly. I'm really hoping I can have a lot of it done by Saturday afternoon when our babysitter is coming over to take care of the kiddo. Mr. Grok and I have a birthday date!

Breakfast: 2 slices of colby cheese and a couple slices of salami, eaten as I was running out the door because I slept in late.
Lunch: Free card for a Chipotle burrito/salad. I got the barbacoa salad and added salsa, a small amount of black beans, some corn salsa, cheese and sour cream and sprung for the guacamole. It was tasty and filling. Mr. Grok met me for lunch with the Grokster. So that was fun.
Dinner: smoked sausage and steamed broccoli, with a couple bites of chocolate coconut almond thingy again. And one piece of string cheese as a late night snack. I'm hungry again. :(

Exercise: None.

Off to pack my bag for the gym tomorrow so I'll have no excuses.

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Day 17 - August 17

Last night, I was talking to a good friend of mine. He's 3 years older than me, and last year, he had a major medical issue that resulted in emergency surgery, 18 days in the hospital, 4 of them in ICU. When he got out, he'd lost 40 pounds, most of it muscle. He's slowly getting back into exercise, but he offered me his sage advice. He said he wished he could go back to himself three years ago, and tell himself how much harder it was to get in shape, even after just those three years from my age to his. He can't recover as fast, it takes a lot longer to build up the strength and flexibility. It made me think.

So today, I got my lazy, fat ass to the gym for the first time in three years. *sigh* Yes, it's been three years. Last time I was in there was when I was pregnant with the Grokster, and that was only up to about the 5th or 6th month.

I told myself I'd go easy. I've had too many times where I started lifting hard, and then was in misery the next three days. A quick warmup on the elliptical, then on to the squat rack. It felt comforting that even after a three year absence, I still knew just how to get into the rack, get the bar and drop into a squat. My form is still good, although a little stiff.

But I was shocked, in a bad way, at how hard it was. I did a set of 10 empty bar squats, then upped the weight to 95 pounds. That should have been an easy warm up weight for me. Instead, it was almost a workout. I used to go 95 - 135 - 165 and then start my working sets. Today, I did three sets of 95, and on the third set, I could really feel the fatigue setting in in my thighs.

I moved on to some deadlift stretches and back exercises, since I have to be careful about my back. It was a quick workout, probably 20 minutes or less. But walking back into my office was difficult. I could feel the exhaustion in my leg muscles. hopefully I won't be in too much pain tomorrow. I've got to get more serious about working out. Time to pull out Mark's PB workout plan and reread it.

Breakfast: 3 strips of bacon and 2 grocery store eggs fried in bacon grease. (couldn't get to the farmer's market this weekend for good eggs.)
Lunch: leftover turkey chili with beans and a sprinkle of cheese. A handful of pistachios. (still hungry)
Dinner: 8 ounce T-bone steak on the grill and broccoli.

Day 16 - August 16

Okay, now I'm back to relying on my memory, instead of my spotty notes.

My sweet tooth might be slowly losing it's grip. I've been following The Diet Cure, and taking several vitamins and supplements to help rebalance my system. but with my kitchen in absolute chaos due to the painting project, it's been hard to find my supps, and I haven't been taking them.

I can tell that the L-glutamine does help reduce carb cravings. I've been craving sweets and carbs more the last few days that I had been. But at the same time, given that my only sweet choice is the coconut chocolate almond thingy, it's not that sweet and honestly, not that appealing. not like a decadant gooey brownie that you can eat 4 or 5 or aw heck,I could eat the whole pan in one sitting, just because the taste and texture are so damn appealing. And damn the consequences afterward.

I swear, I have a sugar addition. If I stay completely away from it, I do notice that I feel better, I don't have gas, I don't have indigestion, I don't have heart burn, I don't get a headache, and I don't have mood swings. And I sleep better. But put that brownie or fresh bread in front of me, and it's super hard to remember all the bad things about sugar and carbs.

I've had to resort to telling myself that sugar gives you cancer. I know it's not proven, but I've read enough studies that I think there's a solid link and a good reason to avoid it. My mom had breast cancer, and my MIL is fighting pancreatic cancer right now. I don't want cancer, so I don't need to be eating any sugar. (You can't hear my whimpering about giving it up.)

Breakfast: leftover venison sausage links, shared with the Grokster.
Lunch: Chicken vegetable soup. Chicken broth made from a store bought rotisserie chicken, and dehydrated veggies left to soak in it all morning. Generous handful of pecans.
Dinner: Leftover turkey chili with beans and a sprinkle of cheese.
Snack: 3 bites of my coconut chocolate almond stuff.

Day 15 - August 15

It's Mr. Grok's birthday. Yep, we're one day apart. I haven't had a chance to buy him a card or a present or anything. Actually, we decided to get a babysitter next weekend and spend the day doing adult things.

So at lunch, I was out looking for shelf liner for my newly painted cabinets, and decided to stop at World Market for a card. While I was there, I couldn't resist strolling through their food section. I can't help it. I like looking at food stuff. I think I had a faint thought of trying to find some nuts, because I was hungry. But I didn't.

I did, however, find a lemon cake in a bag. Not the best thing, I'm sure. But Mr. Grok is not participating in my paleo experiment/lifestyle. And I felt bad that I didn't make him a cake. I can't. Because I would lick the batter and try the cake, etc. It would be bad.

So I figured if I got him a little cake, he could at least have something, and since it was lemon, I wasn't all that interested in it anyway.

We had some lemon curd from Trader Joe's that a coworker had given me last month. So after dinner (turkey chili), he cut himself and the Grokster a piece of cake and drizzled lemon curd on it.

Okay, I had a taste. I had one bite of his cake. The cake was not so great, but that lemon curd was amazing! Yummmmmm! Wonder if it's possible at all to make a paleo version.

Meals:90% compliant (one bite of cake, some beans in the chili)
Exercise: Mowed the lawn.

Day 14 - August 14

It's my birthday, and I'll eat cake if I want to.

No, no I won't. I don't want to. Okay, secretly, I really, really want to, but I promised.

Besides, I have my annual physical and blood work coming up on August 22 and I want to be really good in my eating up to that point, so I can see the effect that eating Paleo has on my blood chemistry.

Meals - 90% compliance. Had a few bites of that chocolate dessert thingy. Eating more dairy than I'd like.

Exercise - Scrubbing my kitchen cabinets to prep them for painting. That's a great upper body and shoulder work out.

Day 10 - August 10

The birthday challenges continue at work. We all planned to go out for a birthday lunch, and we ended up at Chuy's Mexican. I'm not a fan of taco salads, and everyone else was ordering off the lunch menu. I would have felt out of place ordering fajitas and then only eating the meat and onions. Then I saw a MexiCobb salad. So I ordered that, and no dressing. Avocado, greens, cheese, grilled chicken, bacon and tomatoes. Tasty, but I was still hungry when I was done. Not enough fat in it.

Oh, and the chips. They set a big basket of fresh chips and salsa right in front of me, and I was starving. It was really hard to resist, but I didn't even eat one. I know myself. If I eat one, I'll eat a dozen. So I didn't. But I wanted to.

After work, I spent hours running to different home improvement stores looking for a paint kit for my cabinets. Finally found one at the Lowes nearest my house. Go figure. After running to all these other stores.

Meals - 95% compliant. I made a desert-y dish with a can of coconut milk, a 6-ounce bar of Scharfenberger 70% chocolate, and some almond butter. Had a few bites of that. Still no carb-y stuff.

Exercise- does shopping count?

Day 8 - August 8

Going back and entering data from my notes, but they aren't comprehensive.

One thing I promised I would not do for the entire month of August is eat any sort of grain product. No bread, no chips, no rice. And no sugar.

However, I didn't tell my office mates about my plan. My birthday is later this month, and I have a coworker who had a birthday last week. So someone else brought in a Paula Deen banana pudding cake, and looked so happy that they'd made something for my birthday. I didn't have the heart to tell her that I'm doing paleo, and that I really don't care for bananas. So I took a piece and had two bites while in her office. I tried to eat the bananas, figuring it was fruit, and I could avoid a big forkful of the cream cheese/banana pudding combo.

I'll admit, it did taste pretty good, even if I don't like bananas. And it was hard when I walked away, to dump it in the trash can uneaten. Seems to go against everything I had ever done in my life.

Meals, 95% compliance.
No exercise

Thursday, August 4, 2011

Day 4 - August 4

I have more energy than I did yesterday. Still don't feel like tap dancing around the room, but I don't feel nearly as dragging as I was yesterday. Yesterday was terrible! I also teleworked, so no walking around campus in the wilting heat today. That may have had something to do with it. Also, I got a lot of sleep last night.

Breakfast: Pork sausage, 2 eggs

Lunch: Creamy Macadamia Shrimp from Mark's Daily Apple

Dinner: Thai green curry chicken with mashed cauliflower instead of rice.

Snack: Lots of fruit and a handful of pecans after a grocery trip after dinner.

Made an awesome salad for tomorrow. Broccoli slaw with additional fresh red pepper, pecans, diced apple, diced mango and mint, and with an orange juice-rice wine vinaigrette with hazelnut oil. Looking forward to that tomorrow.

Exercise: Mowed the grass (at 8:30 pm when the heat went down). Had some energy to chase the little boy around this evening. Spent a lot of time chopping veggies and cleaning up toys.

Day 3 - August 3

It's so freaking hot out! I was out several times walking between buildings at the campus. There's one stretch of sidewalk next to a couple of construction trailers. The heat and sun rebound between the sidewalk and trailers and it's just miserable walking along.

I was tired yesterday, but today I'm absolutely exhausted. Seriously, it feels like my muscles in my legs are completely out of energy, like after I've done a major lifting session or run a long way. Took me a while to think about it, but I think it's the low-carb flu that I hear hits in the first couple days as your body transitions from carbs to fat burning.

It was so bad in the evening that I just lay on the couch and had my little boy play around me. After he went to bed, I almost fell asleep on the couch. I was trying to watch So You Think You Can Dance, and I was falling asleep and not enjoying it at all. So I went to bed at 9:30. I never go to bed that early unless I'm sick.

Breakfast: 3 eggs scrambled with butter and some seaweed topping

Lunch: Big salad at the cafeteria with lots of veggies, some chicken, eggs and bacon and balsamic vinagrette.

Dinner: I honestly don't remember, and it's just been 24 hours (I'm writing this the next day).

Exercise: None, other than walking across campus a couple times in the heat.

Monday, August 1, 2011

Daily Food Goals

Figured I should write these down here so I can refer to them.

Starting weight:  227
Estimated bodyfat: 35%
LBM: 147

Protein requirements: 100-147
Carbs: <50 ideally. 80 max
Fat: ??

Calorie breakdown
Protein: 400-588
Carbs: 200-320
Fats: Who knows? I'll try to add in some good ones.

Total calories? I don't know. I'll log for a while and see where I am.

17 Reasons You're Not Losing Weight With Primal

Go here.

Just a reference for myself to come back and look at during the month.

Kicking Excuses to the Curb

Day 1 - August 1

You have to start somewhere, right?

The first day of reckoning is always horrible for me, because I know I've gained weight, but it feels like as long as I don't get on the scale, I don't have to deal with it. Why is that? It's so illogical. If anyone said that to me, I'd be thinking, "idiot. Just do it." Apparently, I don't listen to me very well.

Sooooo....Not a good way to start. My starting weight this morning is 227. Up 13 pounds in 2 months. How the hell do you gain 7 pounds in a month, and only able to lose 4 pounds a month? It's so totally unfair! I really feel like screaming with frustration. It's so freaking hard to eat Primal, especially when you're addicted to sugar and you have a husband who sort of supports you, but eats the SAD himself. And a toddler who's always picky and only wants to eat fruit and crackers. Getting him to eat Primal food is difficult, but doable, although it contains a significant amount of dairy.

For me, I'm severely limiting dairy. Always before, I'd do low-carb, but keep in dairy. This time around, I'm going to try and go as pure Grokette as I can. There may be some dairy show up, some residual bits of chocolate on a bad day, but my goal is to start small with them, and reduce to zero.

On the plus side, I've already stopped my soda habit! It took 3 months before I stopped craving soda. When I finally did have a taste of my favorite soda, Diet Dr. Pepper, all I could taste was a slew of chemicals washing over my taste buds. Ick! I used to like that? But I still had cravings for them, can you believe that? Now, after 5 months, I think I've finally beat my soda craving. I have ice tea, no to very little sweetener, a couple times a week, and the rest of the time, it's water.

Sleep last night: Went to bed too late, after midnight. Must improve that. Up at 6:20.

2 soft boiled eggs
1 cup mashed cauliflower with a bit of goat cheese
1.5 T butter

leftover roast
mashed cauliflower
blueberry kefir


Reset time

Apparently, I've left this since May. Not surprising. I always have trouble sticking to things. All I can do is try again. Not trying is truly failing.

No good things to say. I've gone backward. On my "diet/lifestyle change" I've actually gained a good bit of weight, gaining all I had lost and then some. I know why. I'm a sugar addict. I love sugar. I also have that mentality that if I'm going ot start a diet on Monday, I'd better eat all my junk food this weekend! It's even worse when I go on vacation, as I recently did. I went to my parents, and all the old habits came back hard. I started off good, but by the end, I was eating chips and two desserts a day. *sigh*

So here we go again.

My plan is to do 31 days of pure primal. You can do anything for 30 days, right? The only thing that sucks is my birthday is in the middle of this month. But I guess it's always something, right? Plus I'm sick and tired of being fat (again), and if I wait, I'll only get worse. I'll deal with my birthday when it gets here.

My goal is to write here every day and be accountable. I'll try to post my meals and calorie counts/breakdowns, to see if I can track how I'm doing. I'll also post my moods and my difficulties. My successes (I hope!) and my failures.

I plan to concentrate mostly on diet, since that's where I have the most trouble. It's also the easiest and most important to fix, and Mark Sisson of Mark's Daily Apple, claims that diet is 80% of the solution. Honestly, it's hard to find time for exercise with a little boy, home repair, working full time, and cooking Primal. Plus the extreme heat and humidity make doing anything outside pretty miserable in the months of July and August. I'll see what I can improvise inside, but first, I' plan to focus on diet.